Struggle…

Not even an entire month in the new year, let alone since my last post, life has been full of struggles. Some are greater than other, but they are still struggles. People, schoolwork, work, flesh (this is probably one of the greatest wrestling matches/fights I face), finances, life… just to name a few. The greatest struggle I have found is not with the things that I listed above, it’s been my walk with God. I have the time to devote to class and schoolwork, time to work myself tired and sore, to be concerned with everything else in life (current and future) and yet I give less than half a percent of my time to prayer, reading my Bible or just being still and knowing that God is God. It’s a scary, unsettling and bitter fact.

At work I give myself over to a company, to people I don’t really even know and to an idea that the company stands for… and why don’t I do that in my walk with God. Oh, the things that would happen if I were to do what I do for work and apply it in my relationship with my Heavenly Father.

Survival…

Unfortunately, at times and a large part of the time, that seems to be what life has become. And that shouldn’t be. Life is more than a survival and an existence. It’s life, and life requires living. Living is an action, a conscious and deliberate action. We are all involved in life, whether it’s sitting in the bleachers, sitting on the bench or actually giving our all in the game, we are all involved somehow. I’d rather be in the game and giving my all and leaving nothing left, to give the most I have and spend every last ounce of deliberate energy.

I understand that sometimes we all do good to just make it through the day, but with God we can move beyond simply surviving. We can move into a place where we can give everything we’ve got and live life.

Success…

Victory. I don’t know how you measure success. Some things are measured by time, money, quality, quantity, etc… How do you measure success? Maybe it’s the smile on someones face or the look in their eyes that says “thank you”. If defeat is the feeling of disappointment and failure then success is satisfaction and contentment with having done the best and most you could in the given circumstance.

Many times change is required for success. If we are unwilling to learn, grow and, ultimately, change then success is hard to be expected. It is no different in my life, especially in my relationship with God. If I maintain present course nothing much will really happen, however, to make a difference in the life of those around me, to be faithful (physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually) to my future wife, to give myself over fully to my God whom I believe in and serve… it all requires change. This change often requires learning and growing. True success only comes through Christ.

Struggle… Survival… Success… Where are you at in your life? I admit that sometimes it seems like a wave, moving from one to the other and back, but don’t give up. There is so much more to life than our self-centered and fallen nature would have us believe.

In life we have plateaus but they aren’t near as cool nor are they as helpful. Yes, resting is absolutely crucial, but plateauing is not good. It means that you’ve gone flat, and flat can get pretty boring. (flat soda isn’t all that exciting) When we go flat often not far behind is mediocrity. When we settle for mediocrity we aren’t really living, we’re just existing, just getting by. We don’t take risks, and we don’t really live.

Sometimes the same thing happens spiritually. We settle for what we know to be comfortable, we find a safe flat spot where there’s no risk and stay there. At this point we shouldn’t be surprised if God comes in and removes us from our mediocre plateaus, by whatever means he deems necessary. Often this will push us outside our comfort zone, lest we forget that this life is not about us.

In the most recent case in my life I was dealing with some shortcomings in my life, but I wasn’t really taking any steps to do much about them, that was until a little itch for getting into the book of Romans started to need to be scratched. After that came an involuntary meeting with the youth pastor at my church (wasn’t planned, I wasn’t even suppose to be there). Part of the conversation was about me getting involved with the youth group again. Through this meeting I was invited to a two day conference. I didn’t really think about the conference much until my brother asked if I was going, the youth pastor asked, mom said something… next thing I know I’m on my way to the conference, but with a bit of a cold, frustrated attitude. God will get us where He wants us. The past few days have seemingly been about getting me of the plateau, whether I was wanting to or not. Looking back it’s not hard to see God moving me, even through struggles/frustrations/shortcomings, to a place that would get the focus off of me and back on Him, creating anew a longing to grow more and go deeper.

Plateaus are part of the journey, but they shouldn’t be where we stop and settle.

To find pictures from the wedding, you can follow the link at the right to go to my Flickr page.

There’s been plenty that I’ve thought of but nothing has made it here because I really haven’t made it around to it, or haven’t had the time. Once life calms down just a little, or maybe I just make the time for it, I’ll be posting some thoughts and whatnot back up.

For now, to whom it may concern, I pray that you are doing well and that even somehow maybe this might offer some encouragement or provoke you to do some thinking and writing/journaling of you own.

A marriage apart from and void of God is not a marriage. The marriage without Christ is futile and pointless, meaningless. Does this mean that the people and the “marriage” are bad, no, not per say, but ultimately, it does not make sense. Marriage is God bringing two people (a man and a woman) together in order that they may reproduce after their kind. Reproducing after their kind is a twofold thing, man is to reproduce after his kind, in other words, have children… and plenty at that, next is that man was to reproduce after his kind, the image of God… since man was created in the image of God he is to reproduce that image.

Now, there are a couple points to be made here. The marriage represents the union of Christ with His bride, the church (this can be seen in Ephesians 5). The marriage also represents God, since the man and woman were created in Gods image, when they are joined together they are to be a witness for Him… an image, making Him known. The cool thing about this is that when God created them male and female he gave them certain qualities… masculine and feminine, both of which represent different aspects of God and who He is. God is gentle, nurturing and caring… He is also a warrior, protector/defender and provider.

The fact that the divorce rate in America is around 50% is staggering. To ever hear of one among Christians (not those who simply label themselves) is terrifyingly frightening. Divorce is an utterly unfortunate and ugly byproduct of our fallen state, and has become a socially accepted form of adultery.

Dr. Larry Crabb writes in his book, Inside Out, “[Gods] plan really is quite simple. Adam and Eve were to turn to God as the strong one on whom they could depend and then to each other to both enjoy what the other uniquely provided and to give of themselves to enhance the others pleasure.” Marriage is completely selfless, and was designed from the beginning with God to be in the equation. When He is removed, it is little wonder why it seems that meeting a couple who has been married more than ten years is cause for amazement. At this point I could go into love and what that is, but I will save that for another day.

We were not meant to be alone… physically, emotionally, mentally or spiritually. However, no person or thing can truly satisfy us. We are designed to be in fellowship with our Creator, then the rest will take its place.

Fighting for a marriage does not start two years, or however long, in when things start getting rough. The fight starts long before the wedding day. A marriage that is worth fighting for is a marriage worth waiting for.

Tolerance, as defined by Meriam-Webster.com…”1 : inclined to tolerate; especially : marked by forbearance or endurance <tolerant parents> <a culture tolerant of religious differences>”

So there’s our base, to tolerate something is to endure the thoughts, opinions, ideas, views, beliefs, practices, etc of another and not enforce your own.

Intolerance is defined as follows…

“1 : unable or unwilling to endure
2 a : unwilling to grant equal freedom of expression especially in religious matters b : unwilling to grant or share social, political, or professional right

Basically, the complete opposite.

Now here’s something funny, no, this is not the funny that’s going to make you fall over out of your chair funny, this is more of a sad ironic funny. When a Christian claims, “I will not do…” or “I do not agree with…” they are labeled intolerant, ultra-conservative, whatever… however, a Muslim declares Jihad and nobody bats an eye, some organization cries about something and nobody thinks twice, a gay rights or abortion activist cries fowl when, mainly, a Christian stands in opposition and suddenly everybody is all out of shape.. and probably rightly so, but for deeper reasons than they see. More often than not, the very people who claim to “tolerate” are the very ones who, in all actuality, are the most “intolerant” of all. Being exposed to Truth is not always a pleasant experience… if you could ask the Pharisees  of Jesus’ day I would encourage you to do so.

“I will tolerate you if…” That’s conditional, and is a compromise, and compromise will ruin a person, family, city, state, nation, etc.

I was not called to be ‘politically correct’, simple as that. Jesus came to seek and save that which was lost… He also came to divide entire households against themselves. Truth will do that, it is a sword that severs to the core. Truth is an absolute… and don’t tell me that there is no such thing as truth, or an absolute, because in doing so you have just confirmed my point by stating that an absolute and a truth (there is no truth or absolute), because in order to say so you must hold that statement to be true and absolute.

I can tolerate a person and be intolerant of what they do… I can love a person and reject the sin (though, I cannot save them… only Jesus is capable of that). The God I serve has wiped out entire cities and nations, and, yet, He saved a whore. He has also made dumb the wise and made wise the dumb. He tolerates our stupidity, but is righteously intolerant of our sin.

By the way, I want my rainbow back. It is not a symbol of gay pride and freedom, it is the sign that God would never destroy the world with a flood again. It is something that is absolutely beautiful… but we have twisted it into something that stands for the very thing that brought the flood about.

Ultimately, your and my intolerance or tolerance will not matter. I am in no way casting stones at anyone, but before you label me intolerant, look at yourself. This is not meant to rip apart, but to encourage… take a look inside yourself and see what’s going on. We have an option… be intolerant of our intolerance, or tolerant of our tolerance.

(As before, given the patriarchal nature of this and the male viewpoint, this is given from a guys perspective… but this does not exempt you girls either. To both, guys and girls, contemplate these words… and don’t take my word for it… study it for yourself, take hold of it.)

Proverbs 2, 5-7, 9 address the adulteress, Folly and the wayward wife. Now, stepping back for a little bit from the physical, looking at what these represent… the prospect is as grim as death; emotional, spiritual and physical death. In fact, death will very much be the outcome of one who chooses to continue down such paths. Proverbs 2: 18-19 states, concerning the adulteress, “For her house sinks down to death and her tracks lead to the dead; None who go to her return again, nor do they reach the paths of life.”

Proverbs 5 speaks of the adulteress, saying that “… the lips of an adulteress drip honey and smoother than oil is her speech. But in the end she is bitter as wormwood, sharp as a two-edged sword. Her feet go down to death… She does not ponder the path of life; Her ways are unstable, she does not know it.” Her words are seductive, they sound good. Notice that her feet go down to death and that she does not ponder the path of life (life that Wisdom cries out desperately to give you). Now, this one you can use in regard to a relationship, preferably the husband/wife. As chapter five continues, “Why should you… be exhilarated with and adulteress and embrace the bosom of a foreigner?… [you] will be held with cords of [your] sin. [You] will die for lack of instruction and in the greatness of [your] folly [you] will go astray.” The offer may be there, it may look good… it may even seem right… but why do it, why take it?! It is a dead end! In relation to Wisdom, cling to her and don’t let go… in relation to the wife, rejoice in her and “be exhilarated always with her love.” And I would add an “!” to the end of that. If Wisdom and the wife are worth more than jewels… then why chase after trash down a sewer?

Further emphasizing the point, Proverbs 6:24-26, we have been instructed to get Wisdom in order “To keep you from the evil woman, from the smooth tongue of the adulteress. Do not desire her beauty in your heart, nor let her capture you with her eyelids. For on account of a harlot one is reduced to a loaf of bread, and an adulteress hunts for the precious life.”

Proverbs 7 tells of a young man who follows after an adulteress. Remember that the outcome is as grim as death… “he follows her as an ox goes to the slaughter… as a bird hastens to the snare, so he does not know that it will cost him his life.” The proverb continues,  “Do not let your heart turn aside to her ways, do not stray into her paths. For many are her victims she has cast down, and numerous are all her slain. He house is the way to Sheol, descending to the chambers of death.”

Proverbs 9 speaks of the woman of folly, she “is boisterous, she is naive and knows nothing” and she waits for the naive to enter her house, to come to her, the unsuspecting, or even those who know better. But the one who enters her house “does not know that the dead are there.”

Alright, take a deep breath… I know that was quite a bit.

In looking at what is said in Proverbs, first, as we’ve seen, concerning Wisdom and the Noble Wife… then next with the adulteress, Folly and the wayward wife… the difference is staggering, they are in complete opposition to one another. The difference is literally Life and death.

Two ways to look at this, as was mentioned above earlier… The first is in the matter of life. Get wisdom and understanding! In life there will be times where something looks easier, more fun, comfortable, appealing… do not fall for the lips that drip honey! Stay true to the path of Truth. Do not step to the left or right of it. Secondly, in the matter of a relationship of a husband/wife… even if you’re not married… why go after something that is temporary and fleeting? In both the first and the second case, it may not be as blatant and obvious as reading these words. Likely it will take place over time, slowly wearing you down… numbing you. Sure it may feel good at the moment, but after, it will kill you. Emotionally, it will tear you apart.

The jewel that is being polished and made ready is worth the wait, however long it may be. That jewel will bring you good, not harm, for the rest of your life.

Psalm 119:9-11, “How can a young man keep his way pure? By living according to your word. I seek you with all my heart, do not let me stray from your commands. I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you.”

Now, what to do with with Proverbs 31:10? “An excellent wife, who can find? For her worth is far above jewels.” (NASV) or, “A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies.” (NIV) The point is, who can find this woman, a wife so excellent and of such character, one who is considered to be worth more than the most precious of jewels?

The common thought is that a man has to find the woman… or, to put it in a more contemporary context… one (male or female) must date, look around, hunt, try things out, test the waters… find… a significant other. I argue that such a mentality is flawed, and wrong. Such  a mentality, at best, tries to keep God at the center, but in reality, is a slap in the face to the Creator; a very subtle way of saying that God cannot handle it. I am not saying that God cannot use such situations, and He does, as we are not perfect, but at the very core it denotes a lack of trust in God.

Proverbs 31:10 is actually quite simple, more simple than it first appears. An “excellent” or “noble” wife, who can find? The answer… you can’t… I can’t. There is no way that I can find such a woman… especially one that is “worth far more than rubies.” Which brings me to a side note… jewels are usually hidden. In order to find a jewel, especially one so rare, requires One who knows what to look for and where.

Now, combining Proverbs 31:10 with Genesis 2:22, this is my conclusion… The reason that a man cannot find such a woman, such a rare woman, is that God must bring her to him. It is God who joins man and woman, making them one. It is God who joins the two together. It is God who can bring Eve to Adam.

The above line was drawn from Proverbs 4, and at first glance, and rightfully so, this probably looks like I’d be talking about a girl (and I will later) but this is actually a reference to Wisdom. Also, notice the words that are used… they are action words. These are also actions that are not for the faint; to go after her takes a real man, one who is willing to sacrifice and will chase after her and gain her at all cost. If you want to be a man, you must get wisdom first before you get “the girl.”

Something worth noting is that each of these actions have a reaction…

“Do not forsake her, and she will guard you”

“Lover her, and she will watch over you”

“Prize her, and she will exalt you; she will honor you if you embrace her“

“Take hold of instruction; do not let go. Guard her, for she is your life”

Previously, I have mentioned the similarity between Wisdom and The Noble Wife… and I find this to be no less the same. If a man does these things with Wisdom, and gains wisdom, then, when he ‘finds’ a wife he will be able to “rejoice in the wife of [his] youth” (Proverbs 5:18) and “Be exhilarated always with her love.” (Proverbs 5:19) The very things that are mentioned above in bold letters are also the things that -not only is a man called to do- a woman desires. She desires to be known, fully known, loved and cherished, to be held and know comfort and security, and to be fought for and protected.

The Fool and the woman Folly make a horribly great pair, but it is only the wise who can fully appreciate the beauty and worth of a ruby.